The National Church of Bey (Beyonce) Releases Commercial


The National Church of Bey Beyonce releases commcercial

The National Church of Bey has released a commercial, which further introduces people to their quirky religion. The religion, which is called Beyism, centers around Beyonce. The group who formed the religion believe Beyonce to be a Goddess, who walks the Earth in flesh form.

The group’s founder, Pauline John Andrews also proclaims herself the first Minister Diva of the National Church of Bey. “There were 12 of us,” Andrews explained. “We used to gather every Sunday and sing her songs together. One day, while drinking Moscato and smoking Beyha (marijuana), we analyzed one of her songs and came to the realization that Beyoncé is truly divine.” From that revelation, the group expanded from 12 people to hundreds.

Andrews explained that their true numbers rank in the millions. “Whenever you see a large group of women defending the actions of her divine divaness, Bey, they are practicing Beyism,” Andrews explained, “It is not about believing she rose from the dead, or that she is perfect or anything like that, it is about recognizing that she is the Divine Diva that we all strive to be.”

The group has also invited citizens to learn more about their religion from their official Tumblr account, and by emailing them at NationalChurchOfBey@gmail.com.

The Church recently issued a statement responding to the criticism about their religion, which read:

“We are very disappointed in the failure of the public to recognize the existence of a divine Deity walking among them,” the church’s founder Pauline John Andrews stated.” Deity’s often walk the Earth in their flesh form. Beyonce will transcend back to the spirit once her work here on Mother Earth has been completed.”

“As our congregation continues to swell, we ask that you consider what is more real; an invisible spirit on high, or a walking, talking, breathing Goddess who shows you her true form daily? Beyonce’s spirit is entrancing. We know that she was sent to this place to spread love, peace, and joy. While we do not believe Beyonce to be the Creator, we recognize that she still sits among the throne of Gods. There is a lot of false information being spread about our beliefs, but we will correct all of the vicious lie-tellers. As Beyonce spreads her gospel through song and dance, her message provides uplifting, loving, and many times real-life happenings. We humbly ask you to respect our beliefs, just as you want those to respect yours. Open your mind to new possibilities and you will see, just as we did, that Bey is a true higher power. Surfbort!”

- The National Church of Bey (Beyonce) Releases Commercial


  • Barbieblu

    Bust hell wide open

  • jaani

    instead of wasting this could this so called church instead use funds to buy food for the poor? help people who need to get back on their feet? disgusting

  • lamenting over mass stupidity

    After reading a large portion of the comments, I have to conclude… a few of you here are retarded as hell. Reptilian? Really? Seems like there’s a bunch of broke hating hoes on here.